Updates

I have been away for so long. It just didn't seem right, now that my grandfather is no longer around. 6 months since his demise. Where have the time gone to? Can I achieve something in life, with my grandfather's blessings? Sometimes, I don't know what I want in life anymore. I just want to be happy, but it just seems so near, yet so far.
Recently there have been a major restructuring in my company. It affected several of my close colleagues and I was rather depressed about it. In fact, I have lost many of my lunch kaki throughout the years. I am not even doing 1 person's job anymore. Its been so long but did anyone appreciate my efforts. Hardly.
I have been in the company far too long, seeing too much changes and everyone is asking me why am I not moving on?
I wanted to, but the right opportunity just doesn't seem to come my way. What have I been doing wrong, I kept asking myself? But no answer came to me, just like 2 years ago.
I want to be happy. I really want to, but I don't know how to work towards that. Life is becoming so meaningless for me at times.